The next time you feel the urge to threaten me, remember this: I can erase you from history. It will be as though you never existed!
S
Sophia
4 years ago
My head of security was found in a dumpster, murdered. Guess I should of picked a better guy.
S
Sophia
4 years ago
The guy who kidnapped me shouted! He shouted all the time.
A
Admiral NaChayev
4 years ago
Hey TRUMP supporters! TRUMP is a fat orange pig, that needs a BULLET in the HEAD!
A
Admiral NaChayev
4 years ago
Hey, TRUMP supporters! If I had my work way, you'd all be in an EXTERMINATION FACILITY!
O
Odenkirk
4 years ago
I had a heart attack filming my show!
V
VIDEO GAME NERD
4 years ago
Bad news! Grand theft auto VI will cost 30 KARJINKOS! Who has that kind of MONEY?!
B
BOSS
4 years ago
I caught my employees playing their new PlayStation 5 at work. I said, do you guys want an ASSIGNMENT SLIP or a PINK SLIP?
G
GIMP
4 years ago
30 years ago, there was this band of desperados, led by an ALBINO. They would rob Shriners hospital, stealing money for the children's medical expenses. His band was caught, but the ALBINO escaped.☹️
G
GIMP
4 years ago
You made a deal with the ALBINO?! Why would you do business with that scumbag?!
G
GIMP
4 years ago
The detective asked me to identify a body. The ALBINO died this morning, self-inflected gunshot wound to the head.
S
Sal
4 years ago
At my dinner table we use TOILET PAPER as NAPKINS!
M
Mysterion
4 years ago
I know, that you know, that I know, that you know.
M
Mysterion
4 years ago
EL RICHARD--DICKEY DAWSON!!
EL RICHARD--DICKEY DAWSON!!
H
HUSBAND
4 years ago
When I shoplift I put the stuff in my pocket! My wife asked me, what's that Thing in your pants?! I said it's my PENIS!
E
EARL
4 years ago
You guys better get the hell out of here, there's a killer on the loose! A murderer, man. A real psycho! He's cuttin' people's heads off! I'm not kiddin'!
B
Big Ed
4 years ago
After I take a dump, my wife sprays the bathroom! What is she trying to say?!
B
Big Ed
4 years ago
After I get off the couch my wife sprays the couch cushion! What is she trying to say?!
G
Guy
4 years ago
Those snake-oids penetrated our aft-shields!
G
GIMP
4 years ago
The building inspector says my HEAD is unfit for habitation. My HEAD is scheduled for demolition! But--i don't wanna have my HEAD torn down☹️
The next time you feel the urge to threaten me, remember this: I can erase you from history. It will be as though you never existed!
My head of security was found in a dumpster, murdered. Guess I should of picked a better guy.
The guy who kidnapped me shouted! He shouted all the time.
Hey TRUMP supporters! TRUMP is a fat orange pig, that needs a BULLET in the HEAD!
Hey, TRUMP supporters! If I had my work way, you'd all be in an EXTERMINATION FACILITY!
I had a heart attack filming my show!
Bad news! Grand theft auto VI will cost 30 KARJINKOS! Who has that kind of MONEY?!
I caught my employees playing their new PlayStation 5 at work. I said, do you guys want an ASSIGNMENT SLIP or a PINK SLIP?
30 years ago, there was this band of desperados, led by an ALBINO. They would rob Shriners hospital, stealing money for the children's medical expenses. His band was caught, but the ALBINO escaped.☹️
You made a deal with the ALBINO?! Why would you do business with that scumbag?!
The detective asked me to identify a body. The ALBINO died this morning, self-inflected gunshot wound to the head.
At my dinner table we use TOILET PAPER as NAPKINS!
I know, that you know, that I know, that you know.
EL RICHARD--DICKEY DAWSON!! EL RICHARD--DICKEY DAWSON!!
When I shoplift I put the stuff in my pocket! My wife asked me, what's that Thing in your pants?! I said it's my PENIS!
You guys better get the hell out of here, there's a killer on the loose! A murderer, man. A real psycho! He's cuttin' people's heads off! I'm not kiddin'!
After I take a dump, my wife sprays the bathroom! What is she trying to say?!
After I get off the couch my wife sprays the couch cushion! What is she trying to say?!
Those snake-oids penetrated our aft-shields!
The building inspector says my HEAD is unfit for habitation. My HEAD is scheduled for demolition! But--i don't wanna have my HEAD torn down☹️