Bring back Sugar Cookie Eggnog

All FOUR of my nephew Seymour's yellow baby bl*nkies have been reborn with a greater purpose, to serve my ass as a cushion. Seymour can't help his baby bl*nkey while my ass is crushing it, and making it smell like my lotion butt smell!

My nephew, Seymour, just got his FOURTH new baby bl*nkey from Amazon. I already captured his new bl*nkey, just stole it from his hands. I'm sitting on his new bl*nkey as I'm writing this message now. I'm wiggling my butt around on his soft, new bl*nkey. All FOUR of his baby bl*nkies met the same fate, serving my ass as a cushion!

I just got my FOURTH new yellow waffle pattern baby bl*nkey from Amazon, but aunt Debbie already captured bl*nkey, stole him from my hands. I didn't get to snuggle with bl*nkey. Aunt Debbie rolled bl*nkey up in a square shape, put him on her stool by her work computer, pulled her tight jean shorts down and sat on my new bl*nkey in her leopard panty. Her thighs are thick and her bubble butt completely crushes bl*nkey. Aunt Debbie says she can work for hours with bl*nkey under her ass as a cushion!

Aunt Debbie finally got up off my FOURTH new baby bl*nkey. She now used all four of my bl*nkies as cushions on her stool while at her work computer. I didn't even get to snuggle with my new bl*nkey and he's been crushed by her sexy bubble butt! All FOUR of my bl*nkies met the same fate, being sat on by aunt Debbie's sexy bubble butt. They all have her sexy lotion butt smell on them!

Please bring back the Sugar Cookie Egg Nog. My kids love that flavor & won’t touch any other kind. We all love it. Please bring it back!

My beloved KATIE SEARFOSS was assimilated by a borg drone. I found her unconscious body on the ground, she has puncture wounds on her neck where the drone injected nanoprobes into her. She's turning pale!

My wife and I took a tour of the firehouse down the street. She thought the firefighters pole was a STRIPPER POLE! She did a performance on it, upside down with her legs spread! It was a disgrace!

Please bring back sugar cookie, vanilla and caramel. I was only able to get four vanilla eggnogs this year. My kids and I are very upset and want more.

My boss came over for dinner. He noticed my wife's strippers pole in the living room. She came over to a performance on the pole, it was a disgrace! My boss didn't promote me?! Why did I marry a WH0RE?!

I like to sing in the shower. I use my PENIS as a microphone. I really jerk that thing around while singing!

When Hank cheated on me with that transgender creature, I flushed my rings down the toilet, I threw our wedding photos in the pool, I crapped on his wedding suit---uh

Wanna hear what my wife gave me for Christmas? An appointment for a PENILE IMPLANT surgery! Ouch, my pride!

My husband has terrible aim. You should see our TOILET SEAT!

SINGING: The rules that CONSTRAIN other men--mean nothing to MCBAIN!!!!! (Music continues) The fascists causing PAIN--two other men--

I went out on a date with this hot blonde and came home with a souvenir --HER PANTY!

I love sitting on my nephew Seymour's baby bl*nkey after being washed. It's tall, and fluffy and I wiggle around on his bl*nkey I could sit at my computer all day with his baby bl*nkey under my butt!

I have three yellow baby bl*nkies. Aunt Debbie likes to sit on a different one everyday as a cushion while at work at home on her computer. I washed my FIRST bl*nkey and Aunt Debbie captured bl*nkey and sat on him. The fabric softener smell was replaced by her sexy lotion butt smell.

My bastard kids are F**KERS! They didn't appreciate their Christmas gifts, so I tore the tree down already and threw it in the RUBBISH BIN! NO MORE CHRISTMAS!

My bastard kids are F**KERS. Instead of buying me a Christmas present, they just wrapped up some old underwear of mine! MERRY F**CKIN' CHRISTMAS!

My bastard kids are F**KERS! I bought them a lot of crap for Christmas, and still they stole everything from my wallet! NO MORE CHRISTMAS!