Commution of Richard Chopin's Sentence
Steven Robles 0

Commution of Richard Chopin's Sentence

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We, the people of Imarel, do hereby petition for Richard Chopin's sentence of 320 years of euphoric sadomasochistic torture to be commuted. Namely, because Richard is a source of suffering for himself and those around him, just by existing. As such, as an gaudy imp with a penchant for horrible prose, this quotient would be increased exponentially, especially as imps are able to be brutally murdered, only to reconstitute within days. The comedic value also cannot be overlooked, of a gynophobic imp being dragged around on a leash by a broken Astral Nymph-turned-Succubus, chocolate sauce and/or mud-wrestling with Flbbl, constantly getting shoved into women's assets and/or getting run-over by vehicles, eaten, blown up violently by random explosions, and overall being stuck with Jane Doe as a probation officer.

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iPetitions is powered by everyday people — not corporations. With nearly 50 million signatures, we've helped spark change in local communities across the globe. We don't take corporate money. We rely on people like you.