Do you have a problem with a ghost or poltergeist? Have you had a run in with a pyro or power demon recently? Have you had your apartment sucked into an alternate dimension? Well you are not alone.

Millions of New Yorkers living in The Outer Boroughs put up with these events and more every day. But guess what? You don't have to! These para-dimensional beings are here illegaly! Yes, that's right, ILLEGALY! They cross the border of our reality and enter this world without any oversight. If I have to wait in line at JFK when coming to New York why don't these monsters? Mayor Bill de Blasio has promised to eradicate this menace from The Outer Boroughs. But how quickly he forgets his campaign promise once he's nice and snug in Gracie Mansion in the un-haunted Borough of Manhattan. Meanwhile Bar Toto's customers are being terrorized by a foul Candarion Demon and the nice people of Gowanus are being devoured by a terrible sea monster!

The first step to eradication is registration. We must require these ghouls and ghosts to report their place of haunting and residence at all times! Then once we know where they live we can wipe them out once and for all!

So please sign this petition and help us clean up The Outer Boroughs.

Please show your support @ theouterboroughs.com