help kyla to get crackin'.
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HELLO, MY CHILDREN.
i would greatly appreciate it if ya'll could electronically sign this here petish and assist me in skyrocketing my way to pistachio-induced fame.
you see, i am on a mission, a mission of undoubtedly remarkable importance, a mission that could, in fact, change life as we know it.
like martin luther king, jr., i, too, have a dream. and that dream is to star in my very own wonderful® pistachios commercial. snooki has her own commercial. charlie brown has his own commercial. even the one and only keyboard cat has his own commercial. so why can't i have my own commercial?
why is it that only supposed "famous" persons get to be in a wonderful® pistachios commercial? what about the rest of us? the seemingly ordinary, everyday citizens of this planet. the workers and the artists and the students and the teachers. i honestly don't think kermit the frog even likes pistachios, so why should he get his own commercial?! help me stop this simple-minded bigotry! help a sista out with her cause! sign this petition! help me achieve my dream!
and before you click that little red 'x' on your screen and you completely disregard everything i have said, remember this:
W.W.B.D.
What Would Beyonce Do?
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