Elliott Kalan's destiny is to be the new Andy Rooney
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With the departure of Andy Rooney from his moist 60 Minutes news chair, an ornery gap has opened in our hearts - a gap which can only be filled by the able curmudgeoning of Elliot Kalan.
As Dan McCoy, noted television writer and podcaster, once said: "I can attest that [Kalan] hates everything young people like."
"Whatever happened to normal cookies without a bunch of extra stuff in them? [...] Movie titles are too damn generic these days."
- E. Kalan, 28/09/11