By signing this petition you hereby acknowledge your agreement that Adam Christopher Black should (1) become a vegetarian, (2) buy an iPhone, and (3) get a tattoo on that pale, white skin of his. [The purpose of this petition is purely amusement. However, it would be pretty rad if he did one or all of these things, though I guess that would detract from some of the individuality that makes him so gosh darn lovable!]