Dear ABC executives and Bachelor producers,

Please, please, please let Alexis Waters AKA dolphin girl AKA shark girl AKA #1 fan of Nicholas Cage The Actor become the next Bachelorette. Though we are now already on Week 5 of Nick's season, Alexis has not been given much screen time – but even so, it's clear that she is by far one of the most creative, daring, and hilarious contestants to ever grace our screens. And she's outrageously gorgeous to boot.

As a quick reminder of the genius and "TV gold" that is Alexis Waters, she has, so far:
- dressed up as a dolphin shark and fully committed to her character by jumping into the pool
- celebrated her boob birthday with cupcakes
- embraced her very pregnant shotgun bride assignment and ROCKED it
- stole a gigantic poster of shirtless Nick and proceeded to make out with him on it (http://imgur.com/a/wepZh)
- made Nick Cage slightly relevant again
- "Move, bitches."
- "That was the worst pool party i've ever been to... bitches."

Imagine what she could do with her own show. 10 weeks. 18+ hours.

Despite being so outspoken and outgoing, it doesn't seem like Alexis has ruffled any feathers in the house, and is actually shown having a lot of fun with the other contestants. Plus Bachelor alumni already want to meet and party with her.

Picking Alexis is the right thing to do. There's no doubt she would be equally entertaining on Bachelor In Paradise, but she has the potential for so much more. Her Bachelorette dates would be downright magical (like flying turtles on glitter racetracks rather than unicorns trampling rose petals magical) and her suitors would surely appreciate her unique personality and by-then-2 year old boobs. And underneath her witty exterior, there's an incredibly self-aware and genuine person looking for someone to share adventures with.

ABC execs and producers. Please do it. We promise to watch another season (maybe) of Ben and Lauren: Happy Ever After? if you do.

Love,
Bachelor Fans