We, the undersigned, petition the Bureau of Vital Records under the Pennsylvania Department of Health, to change the birthday of Stephen Alonzo "Smags" Smaglio to a date other than September 6th (more preferably the 4th or 8th, but ultimately the 5th or 7th would be acceptable). His constant demonizing and utter disregard for those he shares a birthday with is egregious, portentous and downright wrong. For those reasons and many others, we ask for the aforementioned change.