Rewire Kanye West's Mouth Shut!
After multiple "spontaneous" outbursts by the clown/entertainer commonly known as Kanye West at the expense and embarrassment of others, it is time to take action. His unprofessional, rude, thoughtless interruption of Taylor Swift's first-ever VMA acceptance speech did truly showcase Kanye's insatiable appetite for attention-whoring. Since Kanye cannot control his impulses, let us save him from himself. Let us stop the madness! America, it is time to REWIRE KANYE WEST'S MOUTH SHUT! If this petition is successful and Kanye's mouth is wired shut, I will personally pay for a year's supply of Ensure and bendy-straws for Kanye's drinking pleasure. Unfortunately, the rewiring would not keep Kanye from typing his ass-backwards opinions; therefore, in addition to the rewiring, I propose the BINDING of his hands and his BANISHMENT from use of all communication devices and social networking websites. Kanye's uncensored pie-hole is quickly becoming a matter of national security. America, with your help, we can send this sucker into oblivion! Please sign the petition, pass it on to friends, and inform family members. POWER TO THE PEOPLE!
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