Dear person,

My good friend of 15 years has unfortunately been tricked into allowing a password on their internet. His wife (also my good friend of nearly 15 years - luv ya!) caught him off guard, maybe it was while tired, maybe a little tipsy, or maybe when he was doing something last minute and didn't have time to think. They have 2 children aged 2 and 0, who are nowhere near stumbling across some good old fashioned Bristols popping up in the web browser.

I am of the firm belief that there are a good few years left of paternal porn enjoyment before the children start to find it, and so I would like us to petition to have the password removed.

Just think about it, no more fake boobies, clunge, secretaries, nuns, lesbians, deepthroat, bukkake, anal, creampies, phone in with your bone in, nobwebbing, spiderwebbing, watersports, scat and the accidental sheep in the mix.

18 years of web celibacy.

Please, I implore you, end it now, because if just one wife does this, then every wife will follow..

Sign this petition to allow him access for just a few more years!

Spank you!