Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg has successfully defeated pulmonary disorders by introducing a regressive tax on tobacco products and making it illegal to smoke anywhere except restrooms, demonstrated the futility of term limits by fiscal finesse, and is now saving New Yorkers from obesity - a remarkable legacy. But a larger problem looms: the wearing of pork pie hats by non-New Yorkers. This vaunted symbol of New York wiseguyness must be protected from interlopers.  We call upon hiz honor to introduce a law into the City Council that will permanently ban the wearing of the pork pie by anyone who is not a resident of one of the five boroughs of New York City, Miami, or Puerto Rico.

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