There is a culture war on now, on the streets of Oakville, which I'm told is somewhere in Ontario. Our wonderful, untaintable, glistening and perfect way of life is being threatened, THREATENED, by an evil menace from across the sea. Yes, gentlemen, I'm talking about the Prussian Imperial assault, or, as they prefer to call themselves, "Germans." Now let it be known, that we indeed do not hate the "Germans," but only the "Germanic" way of life. It is most evil and will end in our utter destruction. Can you imagine your son or daughter being married to a "German" ? Information shows that not only have the Prussians installed spies in numerous European countries, and their tireless efforts to destroy the French Empire have not gone unchecked, but they even produce aggression against our own Colonial Parents, the British. Nightly, according to reports, children go to bed in London, worrying if the "blitz" will destroy all they hold dear. So, we, the people of Canada, petition the government to extradite all persons of Prussian descent living in Oakville, and furthermore, ban perpetually their immigration to this great ...city? Neighbourhood? Um,... place.