Elliott Kalan's destiny is to be the new Andy Rooney

With the departure of Andy Rooney from his moist 60 Minutes news chair, an ornery gap has opened in our hearts - a gap which can only be filled by the able curmudgeoning of Elliot Kalan. 

 As Dan McCoy, noted television writer and podcaster, once said: "I can attest that [Kalan] hates everything young people like."

"Whatever happened to normal cookies without a bunch of extra stuff in them? [...] Movie titles are too damn generic these days." 
- E. Kalan, 28/09/11





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