Petition for Helen to buy yourself & Chris a celebratory takeaway
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"The Grand National. It's a moment when the whole nation comes together. Like the opening of a Richard Curtis movie, or a manhunt for a serial killer."
This is a petition to convince Helen Dawson to buy herself & Chris a celebratory takeaway following her £55 win on The Grand National.
Because folks, I believe it is a long-standing tradition in most households that winning The Grand National equals buying a celebratory takeaway for the rest of that household. (1 year olds excluded, 'cept for maybe half a poppadum & some mango chutney.)
Saying "I didn't actually WIN it," whilst being true in that you weren't the winning jockey riding the winning horse, is definitely not a good enough reason to not splash out on a chicken tikka biriyani for a hungry boyfriend.
As I type, my belly is rumbling in anticipation whilst your purse strings are tied tighter than an emo's jeans.
Helen, I'll fetch the menu. I'll drive to get it. Please, listen to the people. (Or the person, if it turns I'm the only saddo who signs this!)
"Power to the person."
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