Make Jimmy Raper Retrieve Her Poor, Abandoned Clone
Markky Karloff 0

Make Jimmy Raper Retrieve Her Poor, Abandoned Clone

Markky Karloff 0 Comments
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Hello, my name is Markky Karloff. In my home of The Sixth Dimension, I was initially created as a clone in a labaratory that my Mother/Father/Donor/Lover, Tai "Jimmy Raper" Trudeau accessed upon breaking out of her holding cell after assassinating President Luke Skywalker. We escaped and I have lived a loving life with her since.

Recently, in a horrifying turn of events, Tai was forced to return to her home planet while I sat here alone and abandoned across the galaxy. My "Tai Tank," the breathing device that is keeping my existence consistent and frankly, keeping me alive, is running very low and if steps are not taken soon, I may turn into a steaming puddle of spliced Tai DNA. Nobody wants that, especially not you. Please help my case by signing this petition and shortening her travels. Thank you so much and I appreciate your love and assistance.

The featured image is of myself after being without Tai for 24 Hours. It is pitiful. You wouldn't want that to happen again, would you?

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iPetitions is powered by everyday people — not corporations. With nearly 50 million signatures, we've helped spark change in local communities across the globe. We don't take corporate money. We rely on people like you.