The petition
It has come to our attention that some residents of the Planet known as Earth, in the Galaxy known as The Milky Way, are not taking care of said planet, and plan to leave it in a mess rather suddenly.
We would like to point out that because the aforementioned group has no investment in the future of the planet, and all the other future citizens of this planet, that they dont want to follow the three R's. Reduce, Reuse, Recycle.
Since the rest of us haven't bought into their particular fantasy which was invented in 1830, they have deemed us "unworthy". In doing so they have adopted the mindset that it doesn't matter that they are causing the effects of global warming to reach a crisis sooner, rather than later. We think this is a selfish and despicable act, and would like to adress the following petition to "the group" for the following considerations:
To all those planning on being taken in the rapture,
It has come to our attention that you are planning on leaving the planet suddenly.
To that end you are not making any changes in your lives to protect this Earth, and your leaders are determined to increase the problems leading to global warming and the coming crisis.
We respectfully ask that you do one of the following things:
1) get with the program, and pitch in. Stop driving SUV's and electing assholes bent on ruining the planet. If you want to practice what you preach, it makes no sense whatsoever to consign your fellow humanity to being left here, if you are going to be like teenagers at a house party leaving beer cans and pizza boxes strewn about. And then leaving without cleaning up your mess.
2)If number one is not acceptable to you, Please leave now. We would like you to rapture now. That gives us hopefully enough time to reverse this mess without your constant interference.
Thank you for your compliance.
The rest of the fucking Earth.
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